On Raksha Bandhan, Shabana Azmi recounts beautiful memories with her brother Baba Azmi.
My brother Baba is the opposite of me in every way.
I talk 19 to the dozen while he only speaks when he is spoken to.
I have no attachment to animals while he could have become a vet. Over the years, he has kept dogs, turtles, birds, chicken and pigeons as pets.
When he was a child, he spent hours trying to dry a makoda (black ant) that had accidentally fallen into his little pond. I would scoff at him and say, 'Arre khud sookh jayega. Baarish mein bhi toh makode jeete hain! (it will dry on its own. Ants survive in the monsoon as well)'
Since I was three years older, I would bully him endlessly.
At a party, he would reach out for his favourite drink, Mangola. I would give him a sharp look and pick up a Coca Cola, which was the more 'adult' drink. Poor lamb, he would reluctantly let go! Today, he orders crates of Mangolas for his kids.
Once he swallowed a chikoo seed. The next morning, I put a twig in his mouth and woke him up screaming that he had sprouted a chikoo tree from his stomach!
Everyday when I came back from school, I would throw my bag on his desk, get into his rubber chappals only to be chased by him out of the house. Abba (father Kaifi Azmi) was convinced someday either of us would kill the other!
Today, Baba is my strength as well as my weakness. He is the son I never had.
He has always been a loved child, spoilt by my mother and indulged by my father. But what I feel for him is indescribable. Siblings bond together because of a shared childhood, shared ethos and shared values.
He tickles my funny bone because there are shared associations.
But he isn't demonstrative. His wife Tanvi lives in despair because he doesn't express his feelings. I wait hungrily for a sentimental word from him... but no such chance!
Yet, when I'm emotionally exhausted or ill, he is there solid as a rock and will drop all else to protect me.
He is a strong family man and loves to surround himself with cousins, aunts and nephews.
He is a terrific son and nursed Abba like a child in his last few months. He is equally protective of Ammi but I don't think he has ever told her that he loves her. He teases her endlessly and she adores that.
Raksha Bandhan has always been a very sacred festival for us. When I was in college, I used to tie raakhis to a couple of boys.
He, on the other hand, would never let anybody other than me tie him a raakhi.
I later reciprocated and did not have any mooh-bole bhais any more!
On the rare occasions when I'm not in town, my niece Mayghna is allowed to tie him the raakhi I send him.
Photograph: Abhijit Mhamunkar
