The National Security Guards came one night and knocked on my door. They kicked it open. There was curfew all the time those days. The military was guarding us. We didn't even have food to eat. But they would not allow us to go out.
There were three of them. Captain Dhanush, another captain and Major Gupta. They were looking for Javed. There's another house here where a boy named Javed lives. But because my son's name is also Javed, they came here.
My son was then 17. He had joined college just two months ago. He was home studying. When he heard them coming he got scared and tried to run away. But they caught him. They beat him a lot. Then they found out that he wasn't the person they were looking for.
That night they caught three boys from this area. They let one go. But my son and another boy was taken away in a jeep.
That was the last I saw of Javed.
The next morning I went to the deputy inspector of police and the SPsaab (superintendent of police) and told them that they had taken my son away. I told them my son was like a dumb person. He never spoke to anybody, never went out with anybody.
They said my son had been admitted to the military hospital in Badami Bagh and he would be released within three days. I went there, but he was not there. I filed a FIR with the police, then went to the court. But I still haven't got my son back.
I went to all interrogation centres. Delhi, Meerut, Jodhpur... I went to every jail. I couldn't find my son anywhere. It's 10 years now. They arrest boys and kill them and leave the bodies far away in some village. There are 2,000 boys missing. Where will you search for them?
I ask them, if my son is alive tell me he is alive. If you have killed him tell me you have killed him. What crime has he committed?
I am still searching for my son. My home is ruined. I cannot sleep at night. I have no peace. I think of my son all the time. I will fight as long as I am alive. I don't want this injustice happening to anyone else.
Dr Farooq (Abdullah, the chief minister) says that everything in Srinagar is all right. Everything is not all right. If his son was caught and killed he would understand our pain. What does he know? He is a leader. When he goes to urinate there are 10 army people accompanying him. Come with me. I will show you each and every house that will tell you what the situation is.
The army people told me they would give me Rs 10 lakh (one million). I told them I had no use for it. I want my son. Can't they at least tell me whether he's alive or dead?
Parveena in Real Audio
Interviewed by Chindu Sreedharan
'I hate India' |
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